Why do I even care?

So this past weekend I decided to visit C out of state in the midwest. Wow, no offense to anyone living out that way, but what a difference from living in a major city on the east coast. What is it with college football anyways? So having nothing else to do but talk, C revealed something to me that I thought was pretty shocking.

Let me start with some backstory first. So, back in college C had a thing for this guy, lets call him Gary. So they made out a bit but things never took off and they remained friends, to this day. Junior year Gary and K spent time hanging out over the summer and got really close and eventually started dating. They dated for 5 years! until a point in their relationship when K revealed she had feelings for this friend of hers, let's call him Eric. Honestly, I never thought that she was completely committed to Gary and she always hung out with a lot of guy friends, Eric included. Well, Gary did NOT take it well, even revealing to C that he hated her and suspected she had been cheating on him and could never trust her again. (Gary and C have kept in touch this whole time.)

So, I had lunch with A last weekend and she asked me if K and Gary were fucking. I was like WHAT? Hell no! Gary hates K, I mean, as far as I know anyways. I know after they broke up (about 2 years ago now) that she moved to the same town as him, actually just about 2 blocks away from him, but I don't think that had anything to do with him, just that she liked that part of town. Well, I mentioned this to C this weekend saying "isn't that weird that she would think that?" She then told me that K told her that her and Gary had actually made out recently..shocking. I never saw that one coming. I think it's a horrible idea if they are fucking, because honestly when do 'friends with benefits' ever work out and if they are doing just that without being back together someone, if not both of them, are going to get hurt, which I don't want to see, obviously.

Anyways, in the course of this conversation, I don't know how it came about, but C tells me that Gary visited her out in the midwest about a year ago. I thought that was totally weird. I mean, yeah they're friends, but close enough to spend $250 on airfare to say hi to? Weird. Well, she then revealed that she ended up having sex with him while he was there. Wow.

I was shocked. I did my best not to reveal this. I mean, she is an adult capable of making her own decisions and who am I to judge her, but it wasn't so much of her having a one night stand that shocked me. I think it had more to do with the fact that she had the opportunity to do that with someone she knew and trusted and felt comfortable with. Here I am knowing nobody, let alone any guy friends I would want to do that with. I don't know, I can't explain it, but I definitely felt jealousy. I don't want a one night stand though, so I don't get why I'd be jealous of that. Maybe it's just knowing she's slept with another person expanding the gap between her and myself and is one-upping me? I don't want to be one of those kinds of girls who keeps score, all I want is one really. The right one, obviously.

I mean, C and K are the only two other single girls from my group and if K is fucking Gary and C doesn't seem to be having a problem getting laid, even it was by Gary haha, then what the fuck is wrong with me?

I need to stop talking about this. In happier news, one of my friends, D, is engaged! Barf. One more down the tubes. Not that I envy her situation, her boyfriend is a loser. But, before long I can just see A getting engaged, K getting back together with Gary and me being the only loser girl on the east coast who can't get a date or get laid when she wants one/to.