I went to a concert last night with A and D and before we went we grabbed a drink. A said she was feeling really bummed lately and she didn't know why. I said yeah, I've been feeling pretty bummed lately too. She was like, yeah, these past 3 days have been awful. I was like, oh, I've been bummed since D's wedding...a MONTH ago. I guess that didn't seem to phase her. She was like, my boyfriend even asked what was wrong, like, it's bad enough that other people are noticing. Funny, nobody ever really notices when I'm bummed out because I never see anyone and live alone. So, really I don't know why I even bother telling anyone. Nobody really seems to care.
I have a birthday party to go to tonight, it's actually the guy from the wedding that asked me why I wasn't married yet. I really don't even feel like going. I'm in such a bad mood. I feel like I should go just because my friends are and one from out of state will be there. Ugh.
I really wish I could get out of here, like to another state or country or something. I've been looking at job sites, but there really isn't anything out there. I feel like this place is suffocating me for some reason. I need to get away. I feel like I want to retreat from everyone like last time. I know that's not a solution, but somehow it was comforting. I can't really explain.
Anyways, I guess I should go get ready for this stupid party.
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2 comments:
I feel you. I am putting up with being #2 in a man's life, just so I can have little glimpses of happiness. I never thought I would stoop to this. Next week, I have been invited to 2 Halloween parties, but I dread going, because I know I'll be the only single one in sight. Hope the birthday party is better than you expected.
The party was pretty lame. On top of being the only single person there, this guy comes up to me AGAIN to ask me why I'm not married. WTF? So rude. I just walked away.
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